process of grace: "It goes fast"

Sam came into our bed this morning. At 3 am.

It's always cute in theory, when your kids climb in with you. And I always think, "Enjoy this while you can, because it goes by fast." Or so they say.

But then the child rolls right up next to you, and he's hot, and he tosses, and he turns, and you think, "Thank God this goes by fast."

The truth is I already feel that regret. The loss I imagine you feel when your children grow and pull away from you. And I panic, "Are they really learning anything from me? From us? And if yes, is it the good stuff?"

This may come as a surprise to you, but I am not perfect. And although he is pretty stinkin spectacular, Josh has issues too. Are we turning out good children?

Ahhh!! This time we have with them slips away a little more everyday and I don't even realize it! I am so focused on facebook, blogging, laundry, what's for dinner, work, home renovations, that I am afraid somedays I don't even remember that we have this responsibility called: Parenting.

And then I turn around and have an 8 year old, making his own lunch, doing his own laundry (yes...it is true), and my children are becoming men right in front of my distracted eyes.

So, lately I've been making more conscious decisions to be with them. For example, on Sunday they were begging to go play the Wii and I made them weed with me. It was great!

And now for a trip down memory lane: