Jake and R

This is Jake.  

He's 5 and insatiably curious.

He taught himself to ride a 2 wheeled bike.

He's our biggest helper, we don't even have to ask, he's already doing what we want.

He's is trying to read, and succeeding!

But he still has one tiny issue he hasn't overcome:

We still love him though!

Monday, May 20, 2013

Sometimes the biggest miracle appears as an ordinary day



Yesterday I had such a lovely time.  I worked in the morning for my dear friend, Margie.  I convinced another friend to finish my shift and left early to meet my sister, she was in from out of town, for a quaint little lunch at Queenie's in Utica Square.

It was a wonderful afternoon.  We sat and ate on the tree-lined sidewalk.  We watched the old man next to us feed the squirrels.  As rodent-like as squirrels are, it was a tiny bit cute to watch it nibble on a potato chip.

We talked and talked and talked.

We talked about raising children with the woman who bussed our table.  She made a strong point, as she cleaned, that HER 4 boys would Never have been able to behave like the toddler who had preceded us at this table.  (He had left a rather whirlwind-like mess on the table and sidewalk, alike.)

We talked about boyfriends and husbands and the when's, why's, and how's of saying, "the Lord told me...".

We talked about mortgages and about the meaning of true repentance.

We talked about rewards for doing right, and about how that sometimes appears in the form of the "status quo".

We talked about how the fruit of our righteousness sometimes looks like nothing at all!  It just may be that we simply KEEP the dear things we already have.  And I thought of my boys.  How NOT losing them would be reward enough for my efforts towards clean living.

And we ate, boy, did we eat.

We each had a sandwich/soup combo and then, at the end, we splurged.  She on a decadent chocolate chip cookie, and I on a sour cream lime tart.  Delicious afternoon, I tell you!

We laughed and laughed and even cried, because that's just what sisters do.

And then we window shopped for a little while, and soon it was time to go.  Hugs, I Love You's and when will you be back in town? and the afternoon was gone.

We left Utica Square at around 3:50.

Today I reflect on that.  On the miracle that it was.

My sister is from Norman, right next door to Moore, OK.  She was with me, but in being there she was playing hooky from a dental appointment.  Her dentist is located in Moore.  Her appointment time was 3p.m.  The tornado came through at 3:16.

She felt guilty for not notifying them of her cancellation.

I talked to her again today.  She saw a glimpse of what used to be Moore.  She reported that there's trash everywhere, the traffic is unbelievable, and that the mud, ugh, the mud.

We talked a little about her being in Tulsa when she should have been in the path of the worst tornado in US history.  She said, "I just feel so cared for."

This is not a referendum on the devastated people in Moore.  It most certainly is not intended to imply that they did something wrong to invoke this horrific tragedy.  Because tragedy doesn't care who or why or how you are, it just comes to destroy, and we have experienced that too.

This is just a simple acknowledgment of God's protection on my sister's life.  And my gratefulness for it.

From the beginning, you were intended.

I listened to Jeremiah 1 this morning, like 3 times.

I love this Chapter.  Maybe you should take a quick 3 minutes and listen!  http://www.biblegateway.com/audio/mclean/niv/Jer.1

Can you believe how rich this is?

"Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you."


To form something is to have a vision in mind, and turn it into reality.  What's His vision for me?  He made me this certain way for a purpose.  Now I have to discover what that could be!

What an opportunity for adventure!


Does this mean He loved us before He made us?  He made us because He loved us?

We are the crowning glory of His creation!  More majestic than the universe, more impressive than the sea, you are.

Think on that for a moment:

how special you are to Him
how intricate you were made, even in your mothers womb
how His love for you propelled Him to form you
how you are just not the result of a conception, you were known long before even your mother's conception
how He devoted His focus to your being
how He saw you from the beginning, and had good things for you even then


This does not speak to the importance of life beginning at conception, NO, this speaks to each life having purpose, destiny, from the beginning of existence.  From before the creation of the earth!

whoa.

I hope to grasp a sliver of this meaning before the day's out.  Me, purpose, destiny, formed with great intention, not just a result of a...well, you get the picture.

And then there's the whole, "He knew me" aspect.  All my faults, shame, sins, and still, with great deliberation He thought on me, and made me.

wow.

Conquer today!!!! BE who He intends!!!  Rest in His knowledge of your name.

He cares for you.

DIY cleaning wipes

I'm cheap (a family trait), but I also love convenience.

The two don't mix.

I also have FOUR boys!!!  I need easy to access cleaning wipes in EVERY bathroom I have.

I saw this jar at Hobby Lobby and loved it, but exercised discipline and refrained from buying it.

Discipline really is an exercise, isn't it.

Anyway, here's the jar:

I was pulling out of the parking lot thinking about it and trying to think of any reason, ahem...excuse, to go back and get it.  What could I store in it?  Anything really, flour, sugar, popcorn kernels (yes, I have that much unpopped popcorn in my house)

And then it hit me!  A thought so spectacular it could only be described as: divine!  I thought about making my own cleaning wipes and storing it in that awesome, gallon sized Ball jar!!

Here's how I executed this ingenius plan:

Hobby Lobby has this jar for sale at $29.99.  About every other week it goes on sale for 1/2 off...making it....err...(i hate math)...$14.98.

But today I found the same jar at Wal-Mart for $13.74!  Score!!

I wandered over to the cleaning aisle (took me awhile to find it, as I rarely shop there) and picked up some Mr. Clean Febreze scented delight for $2.97.  I actually like the Gain scent better (see below).

At home I dug a roll of paper towels out of my utility closet (I buy them in bulk at Sam's Club.  They are sturdy and wonderful).

I maneuvered the cardboard roll out of the center.  This was a tad bit tricky, I would go into great detail about how I did it, but in the end it didn't matter.  Even without it's center cardboard the paper towels wouldn't fit into the jar.

So I unrolled the WHOLE thing!

I thought, "This would be a good job for my boys..."

Then I began feeding the towels through the mouth of the jar.  I thought about rolling it back up, but decided against it.  I am much too impatient to REroll an entire roll of paper towels!

So I fed it through, and through and through, until the towels had filled the jar.

Then I took a break, had a few sips of coffee, and concocted my cleaning solution.

The instructions on the cleaner say to add 1/4 a cup to 1 gallon water, but I went a little overboard and went with 1 cup cleaner to 1 gallon water.

Four boys, remember? These wipes are for around the potty, I need some serious clean.

In a gallon pitcher:

1 cup cleaner
fill the rest with water!  simple!

Pour solution over towels.  They, naturally, compress down with the liquid, so feed more towels through, as much as you can, then pour more cleaner over them, then feed, then pour.  You get the picture, I'm sure.

In the end I had poured 1 and 1/2 gallon into my 1 gallon Ball jar.  On second thought 1 gallon would probably have been enough, but the towels absorbed the fluid and I figured they'd dry out over time.  Adjust as you see fit.

I am so excited about these!!  I plan on getting a jar for each bathroom!

UPDATE:

Missing you

It's a rainy night,
Well, twilight

And I'm here alone,
Well, with the kids

And you are far away,
Well, in a different city

And I wonder,

What if there was a snake in the house
Or a mouse

And who's gonna take out the trash tomorrow

I can mow,
But who will set up the mower for me?

Check it's oil
And it's gas...

Wednesday goals and acceptances

"From today, I shall monitor and regulate no one but myself."

-Dorcas Land, Lark Rise to Candelford (a BBC show I've been watching see pic below)

Words to live by.

Easier said than done...for me.

But a good goal nonetheless!!

So.  Wednesday already.


This morning Josh and I took all of our boys to school.  The same school.  ALL of them!!!

We've had the older 2 in their little private school and Jake's been going to Pre-K at the nearby public school and Sam's been having "quality" time with mom or dad.

But next year they're all going to the same wonderful little private school.  We found out today that Jake and Sam have been accepted.  The whole way home Sam kept exclaiming,  "I can't believe I'm a Bulldog!"

That's a big...ahem... commitment.

Why do we feel it's important?  Here's one reason:

Last night Ben had [another] baseball game.  When the 'pitcher' for the other team was hit with the ball our team huddled together and prayed for him.

That's a sweet thing.

Ahhh, those boys, those boys.  I just love those guys!!!

At El Rio Verde.  They felt like such adults!

Ben

I prayed that he would be peaceful.

He is happy.

He is sensitive.

He wears his emotions on his sleeve.

He is the most friendly of my children and has never met a stranger.

He had this conversation:

Josh:  Ben, you can't be afraid of the ball.

Coach:  Yep Ben, that's right, you gotta be in charge of that ball.

Ben:  It's just that I'm afraid it will hurt my pancreas. 

Coach: Ben, I can tell you that, in the history of baseball, not one player has ever had an injured pancreas because of the ball.

Ben:  Well, I have.

He is Noah's best friend, well, everyone's best friend.

He is Benjamin Walker, and he's 7!

Happy Birthday Ben!!!!

Mom

My mom.

She is a little crazy, my biggest fan (well, she and Josh are tied), and full of wisdom.

She was encouraged to abort....and she still chose me.

She has lost a daughter, gained a few sons, and is a natural grandma.

She was the one I wanted next to me when I was in labor.  

She worries about 'bridges', but not about death.

She is generous, kind, and constantly making new best friends.

She has been a great example of motherhood, and I am blessed.

I love you mom!!!

To be a good mom is to forget yourself, then remember again through the eyes of your child.  

It is to lose your mind, but find your purpose through their accomplishments.

It is to give up your body, but reclaim it as that child clings to it.  

It is to surrender personal desires, but then find satisfaction in their security.

It is a beautiful mystery, this mothering, it shapes the leaders of the future, determines the direction of the world.  

Love you!

God's love.

What the heck does that even mean?  God's love.

Hmph. The phrase goes along with hearts and rainbows and ooey-gooey lovey dovey pictures of clouds and sky. It looks like some kind of spiritualist theory, like some type of cosmic mystery, but how does that, how should that, matter to me in my day to day life?  What does the raw reality of it look like?

Picture God.  What kind of being does he look like to you?  Is he far away?  Distant?  Does he look like your own father?  Does he 'love' you the way your dad did?  But that's a whole 'nother blog.

The bible says that "God is love." 1 John 4:8 Then it says that 'love' is a bunch of adverbs:  patient, kind, not envious, does not boast, honors, selfless, not easily angered, keeps no records of wrongs, hates evil, rejoices in the truth, protects, trusts, hopes perseveres...it does not fail. 1 Corinthians 13

But even that's a little abstract for me to follow, a bit ambiguous for my everyday life.  And then there's the question: HOW do I love my enemy? What in the world was Jesus talking about!? Matthew 5:43

If I take the two instructions together I would be patient with my enemy, kind to him, not brag to him, give of my self for him, be angry towards him, but not easily, not remember his wrongs, hate the evil he does, rejoice when he's honest, protect him, blah, blah, blah...that's all well and good, but how many times do we encounter TRUE enemies in our lives?  Doesn't really apply to me TODAY.

But the thought that currently permeates my thinking is this:  Love your neighbor as yourself. (Leviticus 19:18, 19:34, Matthew 19:19, 22:39, Mark 12:31, 12:33, Luke 10:27, Romans 13:9)  Whoa, what a minute, didn't God say to be selfless in love?

But are those things the same?  Loving yourself and being selfless?  No, of course not.

Okay...so in my everyday do I love myself?

Actually, I don't think I do.

Am I patient with myself?
Am I kind to me?

Okay, those are easy.

BUT:

Am I a little too eager to brag on myself...to tell others of my accomplishments?
Do I do what I feel like, rather than what's best for me...are the two different?
Do I get angry with my shortcomings, frustrated with my inabilites?
Do I remember my screw-ups?
Do I do what I want, even if it's "evil" (wrong)?
Am I honest with myself?
Do I protect myself from harmful situations? People?
Do I trust myself?
Do I fail myself?

I believe that if we master loving ourselves, then we can easily love others and peace can prevail, until then, we need to remember that God does love us.  And he wants us to share in that.

Good thoughts to think on today.  Love you.

Morning Coffee!

I was talking to a co-worker the other day about coffee.  

When I started working with her, 12 1/2 years ago, she hated it.  But now she has to have it every morning.  

She told me her day-off morning routine.  She wakes when it's still dark and everyone asleep.  Then she has her quiet time: prayer and whatever reading she deems necessary...and her coffee is her companion during that time.

I totally get that!  It's my life too!!

So when I found this I loved it!  It's a funny little reflection on our personalities.

Coffee to me is:  the quietness of my home, the boys asleep, the dark outside, and me, all alone, enjoying the solitude.  

I especially like the Frappuccino stereo type! But the coffee-to-go is what I always get.

Which one are you??

Spring-ful day!

The other day I worked in the yard.  I mowed our grass, which is mainly weeds, and weeded a flower bed, which was mainly grass.  What is wrong with this picture?

Good news?  If there's a shortage of food we will be able to survive on dandelion greens.

I love spring time.  It's the most hopeful time of the year.

One of the things we've involved our crazy selves in this year is BASEBALL!  It was a great choice for us!  The other day, while Josh was at work, I went in the yard and "practiced" with them.  I pitched to Noah and Ben.

Good news?  I only hit Ben once.

Jake and Sam hit off the tee and were never "out" (much to Noah's bitter dismay).

We had fun though!  And I ran a little, which is unusual for me.

Sam may be a natural pitcher.

Maybe

Better to focus on one at a time

Such effort!

Pretty good!  Even if it is from 2 feet away.

At least he's happy with his performance

When's the last time you took such pride in one of your accomplishments?

We could focus on the negative, let's not.   Let us choose to be happy with the little things we do right.  Today is a spring-ful day, full of hope and promise.

Heart is where the Home is

Today I have been thinking about IDENTITY.  I have been asking myself, over the past couple years, who the heck am I???

I am Tarah Leah Severtson, formerly Tarah Leah Brennan, daughter, sister, wife, mother, woman.  I define myself as a Christian, a conservative, pro-life (R), who would really like to be considered an (I), but let's face it, to be an (I) is to be lost in a political dust storm.  No thanks, I'd rather stand on a side.  I work for a big corporation, have big dreams, want bigger purpose.  That's not who I am really, that's just what I do.

But who am I.  What do I like, what makes me tick...what makes me ticked off?  What do I want? Most importantly, who do I want to be?

What I have found is, I am just a girl (can I call myself a woman yet?) trying to do the right thing, go in the right direction, and in doing so leave a path for my boys to follow.  And that endeavor is a process.  I will never be perfect, I can strive, I can portray myself that way, but I will always be human and, until I die, subject to human frailty.

I have messed up in my life.  Some big messes, some smaller, but all of those disasters remind me of why I decide to be a Christian.

Jesus didn't come to give mercy and forgiveness and salvation to those who have it all together already.  He came for the messed up people.  He came for me.

Why in the world would a big, giant, perfect God want to do that.  He spans the heavens with his hands, why would he shrink himself to walk on the dirt, in our mire?

I don't know why he did, and I may not understand it, but I can accept it.  I can say, "Okay, that grace can fill the gap between who I really am and who I want to be."

Is there another religion whose god wants to dwell in the hearts of man, who will accept and love just because that's what he does?

If there is, I haven't heard of it.  I see religions that requires work, that expect people to strive to attain their own righteousness, or peace, or nirvana.  Jesus isn't like that.  He knows that we can do nothing on our own to be good, or holy, or righteous.

He just wants us to be us, and, if we ask, He'll take care of the rest.

  Ever feel like Jake?

How are you doing?

The other day I was asked a question.

"How are you doing?"

What a common inquiry.  We say it as a greeting, as meaningless as a quick smile to a stranger in passing.  Are we really interested in how someone is doing?   What if we got the truth every time we asked?

Most of the time we say it to fulfill our duties to polite society.

But this time it was an actual question and I was truly moved.

It was the way the person asked it, with heavy meaning in their voice, that brought me to tears.  Here was  a friend, someone I hadn't seen in months, expressing genuine concern at my well being.  In this giant world, filled with rote movements and individualized problems, I, in my tiny corner of the world, with my small existence, was of interest to someone.

I think we forget how much people need to feel important!  Going about in our routines, the essence of life gets lost.

I believe God wants to ask us that question every morning, "How are you doing???"  He genuinely wants to know.

What if, everyday, we were honest with him and talked to him about it.  Would he have answers for us?  Concern for us?

Today I am going to talk to him about it, about how I'm doing.  I am going to be raw and open and my total self.  I am going to thank him for the things I am thankful for and tell him the things I am worried about.  I am going to tell him what hurts in me and ask if he can fix those things.

And I think he'll listen and will care.  I think he'll will share in my gladness and be strong in my weakness.

And I think, if I ask, he will show me the healing for my pain.

Happy Friday,  May the Lord bless you...and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.   Num 6:24-26

An easy, kid (and adult) friendly meal

You may have realized that I'm no gourmet.  And I love casseroles.  They are the perfect all-in-one meal!  I can have all my staples in one dish and I love it.  If you think they are grody,  I am not the cook for you!

I'm looking for easy, yummy, cheap dinners to fill 6 bellies every night.  If they have a decent amount of nutritional value that's a bonus.  Most of time that comes in the form of tuna casserole, pulled pork sandwiches from the slow-cooker, and my favorite, potato chip chicken.

In desperation, I have looked for many a casserole involving ground beef.  Once I tried something involving canned tomatos, cream cheese, pasta, ground beef, etc...it just wasn't a huge hit in my house.

It seems like when I look for a 'casserole' with the ingredients: ground beef I find 'Mexican lasagna' or some other such nonsense involving layering tortillas...as if!!

Just the thought of cutting through a top layer of tortillas is enough to send me running to my pantry to devise my own "beef casserole".  Which is exactly what I did last night!

I shall call this, Taco Casserole, and it does NOT involve tortillas of any kind.

Note:  there's probably a similar recipe somewhere else, but I haven't found it.  Please forgive me if I'm treading on someone else's 'taco/beef casserole'.

1 lb ground beef
1 small onion
garlic
taco seasoning
1 can black beans
1 can rotel
1 can corn
2 cups, or so, sour cream
1 or 2 blocks cheese
3 cups cooked rice...or 1 1/2 uncooked, then cooked...you get that?

[yes, we do use that much sour cream.  And yes...I do shop at Aldi's.  There's no better 'rotel' than the Mama Casita brand!]

Cook the beef with onion and garlic and seasoning. In a large mixing bowl combine all ingredients, excluding 1/2 cup grated cheese.  Put mixture into large baking dish (11x15), sprinkle cheese on top.  Bake for 30-45 minutes, or until cheese looks like you want.  I like mine almost brown ;).

Cook beef with onion and garlic and taco seasoning...1 packet, or like I do, sprinkle from the
giant container until it's enough.

Mix it up, all of it, excluding about 1/2 cup cheese.  

Tower of cheese

11x15 pan after cooking.  I don't know why I didn't take a 'before' baking pic.  Maybe I thought it would be redundant?

Mama Bear

Papa Bear...note the roasted jalapeno.

Delicious-ness!

My kids LOVED this!  Sam kept saying that it was the "best-ted and good-est meal you ever made".

I always like to have something green with dinner, so I'm serving the left-overs (we had about 1/2 the pan left) on a bed of broken tortilla chips and romaine lettuce as a 'taco salad'.  It's always good to get 2 dinners out of one recipe!

Also, I think it would be good with crumbled tortilla chips on top instead of the cheese.  Kinda like my beloved PCC.



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Baseball and Laundry.

Last night we watched my 6 year old play 'baseball'.  It took 1hr, 45 minutes.

It's coach pitched and then, if they don't hit it, they get the tee.

I learned a few things:

1. An hour and 45 minutes watching them miss the coaches pitches is a long time.  Sam fell asleep on me.

2.  Ben needs a haircut.  His hair is so thick that his baseball cap sits on the top of his hair rather than on his head.  Remember the height of the hot-dog-on-a-stick uniform hats, Yep, just like that.

3.  Ben is a great runner.

4.  It's nice to watch Ben play...and we had beautiful, perfect baseball weather!  Hooray for spring!!!

5.  A good after-game-snack makes any game a success!  

On the way to the long game in my husbands VINTAGE Police shirt.  He wanted to put it in a shadow box and is afraid it will fall apart when I wash it.  But it's so comfy and fits so well that I've declared it mine until it disintegrates.

Also, there are a few things that disturb me today.  

1.  The black widow I found on our front porch, she looks fat with babies.

2.  That Jake was singing, "Call me maybe" yesterday after school.

3.  That Jake was teaching Sam, "Call me maybe". 

4.  That my 6 & 8 year old have started applying my husbands deodorant!?!  What???

5.  The piles and piles of laundry to be done.  Guess I better get to it!

Happy Hump day everyone, may your Wednesday be wonderful.